Yes, my anger...
I always said that I don't want to be a teacher,
one of the reason is that I have bad temper,
and especially lack of patience.
During the month, I've been enduring with the kids emo and nonsense.
OK, sometimes of course they are cute, and most of the time they really are,
just that, when it comes to me, I'm the only teacher that they are dare to bully.
And today is even worst!!!
There are certain reasons:
1. I have problem having a quality sleep, and feel sleepy since yesterday
2. It's hazy here, the air makes me so uncomfortable, especially throat
3. Some thing's wrong with my nose, I can't really smell things
4. There's 2 kids continuously crying for the whole morning, and my mind is in a tumult.
Then, during tuition, the 7 kids talking here and there, walking here and there, running here and there, jumping here and there.... Totally ignoring my words and if you were me, will you yell at them? Whatever your answer is, I did YELL at them. And made a kid stand at the corner looking at the wall.
Yup, I'm really really angry, and I repeated the rules I told them the first day I officially take over the class. OK, one of them is this "When doing homework, absolute silence is required". But they are always talking and complaining a lot!! It's way more than a lot, it's like every second, no kidding!
My problem included that THEY ARE NOT AFFRAID OF ME! So, they don't have discipline. Hey, people, am I so friendly? I don't think so. Am I so easy to be bullied? No, not when I'm in high school and uni, but why now??
ARRGGHH!!! Kids.... are both angels and devils.
I'm so going to see when is the next explosion of my anger. Hopefully there will not be one... really. I feel sorry and guilty yelling at kids, they doesn't know much yet in this world right? They are still innocent and naive, but sometimes devil-ly lack of discipline.
The good thing is, I reallize that I'm not that impatient, you see. A month.... I thought the second week I'll be killing someone already, but nop, till today, four weeks....